Farewell, you Magnificent Green Bastard

"ptak appreciates old racecars" (racecarptak)
05/19/2015 at 20:03 • Filed to: panzerfaust

The story of Witu. [vee-tush]

This is a Mercedes-Benz Vito. It came off the assembly line somewhere in Germany in the mid-’90s, was painted a lovely shade of dark green and somehow made its way to Poland, where my family bought it in 2005. Back then, it was in like-new condition. Since then, it’s slowly deteriorated. Not that it sat in the weeds. It was our main peopleschlepper for almost a decade.

This car drove from Warsaw to Rome in 2007, all over Italy - Florence, Venice, etc. and back. Warsaw to Prague in 2009. It was used on endless road trips around Poland to buy various pieces of junk, to transport pianos, furniture, and entire groups of immature teenagers, as I remember fondly.

My brother took me on these trips twice a week to see the “underground racing scene” in Warsaw, which was mostly kids in Golfs and E30s blowing out tires in abandoned parking lots. I’d sit in the back seats and hope some of the cool, older kids would notice me. Sometimes these nights made me feel inexplicably lonely for some reason, looking out the windows at the dark streets and lights. Sometimes something fun would happen like a guy jumping on the hood of a cop car. Most of these things were witnessed by my wide eyes from the interior of this car.

My brother tried to drift it in 2008. This was before he was good at it so the lightpost was not forgiving. I wasn’t there to see it but I was told it was biblical. It was repaired after months of tagging around Authorized Services, and shortly after a race car driver’s boy toy rammed a BMW E36 M3 into the front, and the same night, the bumper fell off in a puddle and was since holding on by zipties in proper drifter style. We even gave it nicknames... Witu, Panzerfaust (because it’s big and German and green, of course!).

About a year ago it transitioned from I Won’t Be Seen in This, to Unusable, and so it was parked in front of some babushka’s house on our street, so the cops wouldn’t come asking if it was ours.

A few days ago it was sold for parts, gone from its place on the sidewalk. I was sad to see it go, unlike my parents, who aren’t vehicular romantics. I don’t blame them. But this magnificent green bastard will always hold a place in my heart, if only for the memories.

Farewell, Panzerfaust.